Husband Breakthrough and More of Legacy

So I decided to keep telling you all about how this new lifestyle is going and a little more of Legacy, so if you’re not interested in the story you don’t have to read it.

After dinner tonight my husband reached in the cabinet for some Tylenol. He does that a lot. I asked him if he was ok, he said, “Got a headache. Again. Seems like it’s a non stop thing.” I see my in and say in a matter-of-fact tone, “I used to have headaches all the time. I was popping some kind of pain killer every 4 hours. I haven’t had a headache in…oh, about 3 weeks.”

He looked intrigued and said, “What are you doing different.” Immediately he looked as though he wished he hadn’t asked, because I think he knew the answer, but too late he did ask. So I told him. “Haven’t had any coffee in, oh I don’t know about 2 weeks and haven’t had meat in 3. I really thought I’d miss it more, but it just feels so good to feel this good.”

He nodded thoughtfully and said, “You really think that’s what it is?”

“Yes, I really do,” I told him.

He nodded again, but didn’t say any more. Which means he didn’t dispute what I was saying. Hey that’s almost a resounding approval for him. I didn’t say anything either, just smiled. But the seed has been planted.  

Now for Legacy:

From the distance of the next tract Joe watches prospective buyers amble in and out of the recently constructed homes. He smiles to himself at the sound of squealing children. As he pours the foundations for the next line of homes he imagines the people opening closet doors and testing kitchen cupboards. They know nothing of the coyote in the undeveloped hills or the evidence of his existence hidden under the large, shinny, black and white linoleum squares.

***

The young girl’s mother stands in the entryway with her baby brother on her hip. She looks and sounds tired as she admonishes them not to touch anything. The girl’s older brother and sister head down the hall to claim bedrooms, should their parents finally choose a house. Her younger brother races her to view the most important part of the house: the back yard. “It’s huge,” he whispers.

Looking out the large, glass, patio door she sees only the hill with its small pine standing midway across the crest. That will be her place of escape; the ideal spot to think and write down her thoughts. She feels it. Her mother’s smile tells her she feels it too. They are home.

She’s eight and already knows her destiny. Ever since she read The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by her favorite Missourian, she knew someday she would be a writer. She will write her own adventure stories.

When the girls in her Brownie Girl Scout Troop got bored on their first camping trip, she suggested they tell stories. They were enthralled with her adventure of being lost in the woods, trying to find their camp before her parents knew she had broken the rules and wandered off by herself. What did it matter that it had actually been her father’s adventure, not hers? Some details of stories were insignificant. She knew the important ones.

***

As the families settle into their new homes the coyote’s curiosity gets the better of him. He steals to the old oak to watch these creatures’ morning ritual. The young walk in pairs and groups. He wonders where it is they go everyday. He wonders especially about the one who walks alone, her face hidden by something she holds.

“Hey, get out of here,” a man yells.

He takes off into the hills.

***

She looks up from her book, startled. Is that man talking to them?

“Not you guys,” the man laughs, “just some old stay dog that hangs out around here. If he comes near you just yell at him; he’s kind of a coward.”

She glances up and sees an animal running into the hills. Is that a dog? It doesn’t look like a dog. She’ll look it up in the encyclopedias her teacher keeps on the shelf when she gets to school. She thinks it might be a wolf.

The pictures in the book tell her it’s a coyote. Coyote’s ears are larger and pointy than wolves and their tails are big and fluffy, like the animal she saw that morning. She tells her teacher of her discovery, but her teacher tells her not to worry, “It was probably just a stray dog.”

Her teacher doesn’t understand; she isn’t worried, she’s fascinated.

Monday – Exercise – 20 minutes; 1.1 mile (I must be getting faster! YAY)

• Breakfast – An orange, hard boiled egg with onions and peppers and 1 cup of oolong tea with honey.
• AM Snack – a handful of sugar snap peas
• Lunch – ½ a Amy’s Vegan Pizza
• PM Snack – a stuffed grape leaf and cup of tea with honey
• Dinner – 2 small breakfast burritos, eggs, tiny bit of cheese, salsa and peppers and onions on whole wheat tortilla

And oh yeah, weight 201.6 I was really hoping to break that 200 pound thing but at least I lost.

Lost .6 pounds this week; 5.1 over all.  

The Good Shepherd

This morning at church they talked about the Good Shepherd and how he cares for his sheep. That particular gospel annoys me a bit because it talks about how the paid worker would run if a wolf came and let the sheep scatter and probably be eaten and I am a kind of paid worker and I would never run and leave my little lambs to a wolf, metaphorically or otherwise, but that’s beside the point. It got me thinking about a story I wrote a while ago. When I was a kid sheep used to come to our hills by the hundreds for a few weeks or maybe months, I’m not sure. But every year at the same time of year they’d show up. Part of the story is about that, so I’m going to post the story over the next few days for your enjoyment.

It’s called: LEGACY

He roams the tinder-dry hills in search of food. Even here the air is searing. The pungent smell of smoldering desert grass permeates his nostrils. Is it the fire or just the heat of the season? The flames, fanned by those wretched winds devoured all they could, then died. The taste of smoke, seasoned the lizard that was his only meal in two days. How long has he been wandering? When was it he fled familiar territory? He did not know. He knows only hunger, loneliness and fear. Rabbits are abundant in this little valley, but without the support of his family, catching them is difficult. Why had he alone escaped the inferno to end up here in this land of unattainable plenty? He was not the alpha nor was he the best hunter. How was it, the blaze claimed all in his pack, leaving him to wander alone in this land of scrub oak, dry grass and impossible to catch rabbits?

           

“Joe!” the foreman screams, “Get that shit poured so we can get out of here. My kid’s got a game tonight.”  

            It’s Friday. The last of the foundations for the new houses are almost complete. Soon this row of concrete slabs will be a neighborhood. Families will replace the multitude of jackrabbits and reptiles that inhabit this land. Joe can almost hear the sound of children laughing and smell the Sunday afternoon bar-b-q. Widowed and childless, this is the legacy of his mundane life. The families who will live here may never know his name but a part of him will always be here.

While the strange intruders disrupt the landscape, he continues his search for food. He finds nourishment from occasional road kill of rabbit or squirrel.  Cars speeding by on roads which earlier had been open land are all that keep him from starvation. But the small animals are learning and he is hungry. The smell of sandwiches and cookies linger in the air long after the men are gone. When his hunger grows stronger than his fear, he investigates. Their absence gives him a boldness he wishes was real. These men have taken the hard ground that used to be a place of reptiles and rabbits and transformed it into an even harder ground, impenetrable by the former inhabitance. Nosing through their unfinished work, he finds only meager scraps. The soft mud-like consistency confuses him. He returns to the loneliness of the hills.

 “Shit! Should we redo it?” Joe asks the foreman upon discovery of the hardened canine footprints in the slab Monday morning.

“Why; whose gonna see it? Come on we’re behind schedule. Let’s get the walls up so we can get the flooring finished before anyone else knows.”

Sunday – Exercise – Not today

• Breakfast – An orange, Cheesy eggs and 1 cup of oolong tea with honey.
• AM Snack – had a late breakfast
• Lunch – bowl of refried beans and rice and a rice and veggie stuffed grape leaf
• PM Snack – a couple of sweet pea pods
• Dinner – ½ a Amy’s Vegan Pizza.

The Phantom Calls

Well the chicken soup worked! I woke up feeling much better than I have in days. I decided to try the elliptical. Wasn’t sure if I’d be able to make it the full mile but I was determined to give it my all. I read somewhere that it’s good to have a cup of Oolong tea before you exercise because it boosts your metabolism. It’s Saturday and I had more time than normal so I decided to try it. I brewed myself a nice cup of tea with honey and while it brewed and while I sipped I read some more of my friend Terri Farley’s book, The Phantom Stallion. She wrote 27 of them! I’m reading the first one. They’re kid’s books, but since I write kid’s books I also read kid’s books. It’s an amazing book and I highly recommend it, especially if you have young girls who like horses or just want to read a story with a strong female lead character. You know a book is good if when you’re not reading it, you can close your eyes and still see it. As I’m chugging away on my elliptical I often close my eyes and listen to Jimmy crooning away. Today, as I closed my eyes Jimmy had competition. I kept hearing the neigh of the wild mustang. I could see him flying across the Nevada flat lands. I’m not even a horse person. Oh, I love to watch them, they’re beautiful animals, but I was never one of those kids who wanted a pony for Christmas. As I neared the .5 mile marker on my elliptical I knew I’d have the energy to go the full mile. I hit the full mile and kept going. The 1.5 point approached and I thought about stopping, but I closed my eyes and heard that Phantom Stallion calling me. I kept going. As I hit the 1.8 I tried to imagine myself riding on the beautiful horse with mane flying, his and mine. What does it matter that my doo is too short to fly and I don’t have the first clue about how to ride a wild mustang? I hit the 2 miles and felt a little like I’d fallen off that horse and been dragged for a few miles, but I did it. I was hot and sweaty and tired. But I did it! Thanks for the encouragement Phantom and Terri!

Saturday – Exercise – 40 Minutes on the elliptical; 2 miles (YAY ME!!)

• Breakfast – An orange, 1 cup of oolong tea with honey.
• AM Snack – Too busy
• Lunch – bowl of refried beans and rice with 10 tortilla chips; and a rice and veggie stuffed grape leaf (I love Costco!)
• PM Snack – 10 little carrots and another stuffed grape leaf
• Dinner – Another stuffed grape leaf (they’re so yummy) and a large loaded salad.

Longing for the Butterfly Room

Don’t let this picture fool you, this is only after running around like a crazy, Caterpillar kid!

Soon after I started doing Child Care out of my home 20 years ago I read an article about physically demanding jobs that do little to nothing as far as exercise. Top of the list: you got it, child care. The article said doing child care was one of the worst things you could do for your health. Never mind all the runny noses and coughs in your face, it said most people (of course they meant most women) who care for children all day are too exhausted to exercise or eat properly. Lunch usually consisted of what ever was left on the kids’ plates. (When I read that I laughed, I thought I was the only one who did that). A few days later I went to a monthly meeting of my Child Care Association and apparently they read the same article because that was the topic for the evening. They talked about eating better, getting enough exercise and taking care of yourself as well as you take care of the precious little ones. I looked around the room and realized that most of the women (there were no men in the group) that had been doing this for a long time were overweight and tired looking. At the time I was 20 years younger and about 70 pounds lighter. I scoffed at the article and at their warnings. After all I was different. I made exercise for me part of my daily routine with the kids. Every morning together, me and the kids I cared for, worked out for 45 minutes with my favorite fitness guru. Richard Simmons would keep me slim and healthy. I wonder what ever happened to that tape?

So…I don’t know if kids are getting more active or if I’m just getting old, but today the 6 kids I had made the Caterpillar room look serene. I chased them. I carried them. I pushed them on the swing and I kept them from clubbing each other with plastic golf clubs. If that’s not exercise I don’t know what is. But I think I’m ready for the elliptical again.

Friday – Exercise – Chasing around the kids of the Caterpillar Room

• Breakfast – An orange, 1 cup of oolong tea with honey.
• AM Snack – 1 cup of oolong tea with honey.
• Lunch – 2 bowls of chicken noodle soup. (I know, I know, but it was Campbell’s Healthy Select so there was hardly any chicken in it at all and I’m running out of ideas on how to knock out this stupid cold or flu or whatever I have going. Hopefully chicken soup will do the trick.)
• PM Snack – a bag of popcorn, minus what the kids pilfered and a cup of NF yogurt
• Dinner – Snapper Jack’s Shrimp Burrito. (Hey, it’s not meat and I figure I already had the chicken today, might as well do all my non-vegetarian stuff in one day. Tomorrow back to the elliptical and salad for sure)

Robo Calls Suck (especially at 4 AM)

So what ever happened to that do-not-call list? I signed up a long time ago. I stopped getting calls for a while then they started to come back. Lately, seems like I get more solicitation calls than anything else. And most of the time it’s not a real person! Rachel with Card Services calls me at least once a month. Suck it Rachel, I hate you, leave me alone. Every contractor in our area calls constantly to see if we need work done. Hey I’m really sorry that your business is down by NO!!! I’M NOT HAVING WORK DONE!!! Then last night, or rather early this morning, I’m trying to get the sleep I need to get over what ever this is that I have and the phone starts peeping while the answering machine says something about my call not going through, “Hang up and dial again,” in her robot sounding voice. YOU CALLED ME IDIOT, I DIDN’T CALL YOU!! It’s 4 AM for goodness sake. I jumped out of bed to find out what was going on, then of course couldn’t fall back to sleep. Larry (that’s my husband) woke up and snarled something about, “Who the hell is calling at this hour?” then promptly fell back to sleep. I laid there for a minute, but was way too keyed up to ignore his more and more frequent and loud snoring and finally went to another room to try and sleep. I think I finally fell asleep at around 5:45 but woke up at 6:45 to shower and start my day. Give me a break! I need some sleep! I gotta get better so I can start exercising again.

Thursday – Exercise – Not today

• Breakfast – An orange, 1 cup of oolong tea with honey.
• AM Snack – I’m so tired I can’t even remember if I had an AM snack.
• Lunch – a large, loaded, yummy salad
• PM Snack – 1 serving of Snappea Crisps and non caffeine herbal tea (no honey)
• PM Snack number 2 – An orange.
• Dinner – 2 bowls of tomato, basil, bisque with a handful of croutons.

On The Mend

                                                  

Well we both slept much better last night. My husband’s antibiotics for the ear infection and the Airbourne I’ve been downing seem to be doing the trick. Not 100% yet, but getting there. I thought it would be better to forgo the exercise for one more day, I’ll see what tomorrow brings. I really don’t want to relapse.

I ran out of oranges so I’ve been eating bananas but thought the vitamin C would help so I went out and picked some more. It rained early this morning so the leaves were full of water. Of course I didn’t realize that until I picked an orange and got rained on. It was kind of a fun surprise. I love that we have these orange trees in our back yard. I’m really glad Kerrie persuaded me to start eating them again. I remember when she was little I’d pick 4 or 5 and cut them up for her, Kelly and the day care kids and we’d eat a juicy, delicious snack of oranges almost everyday. I don’t know why I ever stopped doing that but we’re doing it again. Fresh, yummy oranges right off your own tree: best way every to get your vitamin C. Hey that rhymes!

Wednesday – Exercise – Not today

• Breakfast – An orange, 1 slice of sourdough toast and 1 cup of oolong tea with honey. AM Snack – hand full of nuts.
• Lunch – Left over spaghetti
• PM Snack – 5 prunes and non caffeine herbal tea (no honey, it was sweet on its own)
• Dinner – beans, rice, cheese, peppers, onions and a teaspoon of sour cream all wrapped up in a whole wheat tortilla and an orange. I haven’t had the orange yet, but writing about how good they are made me want another one. I’m gonna go get one as soon as I post this.

Tough Day

Had a really rough night last night. I’m not feeling good and my husband is worse. We were both up all night coughing and he has an ear infection on top of that. I got up at 3 AM and got us both some cough medicine. He went to sleep but snored for the rest of the night. He’s not usually a snorer so it wasn’t something I’m used to. I think I got maybe 2 hours of sleep, from 5 to 7. I usually get up at 6 to exercise so I missed that.

Hopefully tonight will be better because I’m setting that alarm and getting up!!!

Tuesday – Exercise - Nada

• Breakfast – A banana, 1 slice of sourdough toast and 1 cup of oolong tea with honey. (1/2 the caffeine of coffee.)
• AM Snack – too tired to eat.
• Lunch – This is so embarrassing. 4 Little Caesar’s breadsticks dipped in cheesy jalapeño dip and cup of LF yogurt. (I should’ve had a snack)
• PM Snack – an orange
• Dinner – small plate of spaghetti, a salad and a glass of white wine. (I know, I know, it’s supposed to be red with spaghetti but the white was open and only one glass left)

Uh oh, I’m A Veggie Preacher

Went to a Writer’s weekend in San Gabriel this weekend and didn’t get a chance to post but I ate pretty healthy, vegetarian stuff all weekend. It was a fabulous weekend! Met lots of really great writing people and learned lots. I completely redid the antagonist in my next book. It was going to be a man, but changed it to a woman and on the advice of a great teacher, Terri Farley who wrote the wonderful MG Phantom Stallion Series, decided to give her a name I like. So the villain in the second book of LUNA MOON is Lilly O’Shea.

I was able to request vegetarian meals for the weekend and as I was eating my yummy veggie wrap one of my fellow writers asked me what it was and if it was good. We got into a discussion about my new lifestyle and blog. I told her how much better I felt since going vegetarian. She said, and I quote, “Hmmm, maybe I should try that.” I laughed and told her I thought it was a great idea but my biggest fear when I started was that I would turn into one of those people who went around trying to recruit people to be a veggie. She laughed and said, “Uh oh, looks like your worst fears are realized.” Turns out it wasn’t so frightening. If she does it and it makes her feel better too, I did a good thing.

Oh, I almost forgot it’s weighday: 202.2 pounds. I lost 2.2 this week and I miscalculated last time, I lost 2.3 pounds not 2.2 so overall I’ve lost 4.5 pounds. YAY!

I’m still kind of in shock that I’m telling the world (or at least the small part of it that reads this) how much I weigh.

Monday – 20 Min. 1 mile on the elliptical

• Breakfast – A banana, 1 slice of sourdough toast and 1 cup of coffee. (Kerrie and Hannah convinced me, gonna try herbal tea and honey tomorrow.)
• AM Snack – a piece of blueberry bread.
• Lunch – a bean, rice and cheese burrito
• PM Snack – a handful of nuts
• Dinner – 3 pieces of cheese pizza. (should’ve stopped at 2)

A Quicky

I gotta do this quick. I’m exhausted. Just got back from the Style Alliance Fashion Show. (You like that name, Style Alliance? I made it up.) Made me cry. Two years ago Kerrie started her High School’s (and mine btw) first ever Fashion Club. She was president for 2 years. Both years she organized a Charity Fashion Show. She wasn’t sure if the club would continue, but not only did it continue they did a Fashion Show too! It was awesome!  Of course not quite as awesome as when Kerrie organized it, but awesome just the same. The best part, they served food I didn’t have to help prepare. Last year I spent most of the show in one of the classrooms cutting up salad and chopping cucumbers. (Thank goodness for Pampered Chef’s Salad Chopper. My oldest daughter Bonnie is a consultant if you need anything.) Didn’t see any salad this year, but the first thing I did was check to see if they had anything without meat. They did. At the intermission I went for the cheese pizza and completely walked right passed the dessert and chips table. YAY me!

Tomorrow I’m going to a 2 day writing workshop so don’t know if I’ll be able to blog. But I’ve already orders the vegetarian meal! Have a great weekend everyone!

Friday – 20 Min. 1 mile on the elliptical

• Breakfast – An orange, low fat yogurt and 1 cup of coffee.
• AM Snack – a banana
• Lunch – Asian vegetables. (it was broccoli, carrots and green beans, not sure why they call them Asian)
• PM Snack – a single serving of Special K sour cream and onion cracker chips
• Dinner – 2 small squares of cheese pizza and a handful of grape tomatoes.

Meet Me At The Bottom

Almost 25 years ago, when I was much younger and much thinner, I went on a little hike with my kids. Back then I only had 2. We got up before the sun, ate a quick breakfast and started hiking. Right around lunch time we could see the Colorado River from the bottom of the Grand Canyon. It was one of the most incredible experiences of my life and I hope theirs. We won’t talk about what it was like hiking back out again on the same day. I’ll leave that for another post. The point is I’ve always wanted to do that again. Time went by. I got remarried and had 2 more kids. I got older and fatter and stiffer. I always thought that even if I did get down to my goal weight these old bones would never make another trip like that. It made me kind of sad. But I’ve changed my mind. If a week of a vegetarian diet can make me feel this good, just think what a year can do? Kerrie and I made a promise to each other. We’re both going to get fit and healthy and we’re going to the bottom! I’ll plan the trip a little better this time. You have to make reservations to camp at the bottom over night, so we might take a couple of nights and explore the valley a bit before we make the hellish assent. But I’m going to the bottom again. Jeffry and Bonnie if you want to do it again let me know and Kelly if you want to go with us, we’d love to have you. I’m thinking maybe Memorial Day weekend 2013! What do you say?

Thurday – 20 Min. 1 mile on the elliptical

• Breakfast – An orange, whole grain toast and 1 cup of coffee.
• AM Snack – 2 medium sized carrots
• Lunch – Tofu burrito
• PM Snack – way too many Special K sour cream and onion cracker chips (Never go grocery shopping when you’re hungry)
• Dinner – Large loaded salad. (Looks yummy doesn’t it!)

How Ya Feelin’ Today?

When I started this vegetarian thing I thought I’d do it for a month for Kerrie, but there was no way I was going to do this forever. I mean…BACON, CHICKEN, HAM and TURKEY Paninis!  Come on, am I really supposed to give up those things for the rest of my life? But today when my son-in-law asked me how I felt I realized something. I feel good. Really good. Sure, I still have a whole lot of weight to lose, but I actually feel good. I sort of accepted the idea that I was going to live in pain for the rest of my life. Some part of my body has hurt for the past, probably 1 to 2 years. I’ve gone to doctors to see if they could help. I found out the varicose vein I knew I had really needed to be taken care of. I had it zapped. (That’s what they do now, they used to rip them right of you, now they stick a wire into your leg, heat up the wire and kill the vein and it just sort of dissolves, anyway, I had that done.) But the leg kept hurting. All the doctors said the other pains I had were probably stress related. That’s doctor speak for: “I really don’t know what’s wrong with you.” I chalked it up to age. Now I know it’s only been a week, but if a week of this vegetarian thing can make me feel this good, I don’t know that I want to go back. I have a big salad bowl I made a long time ago. On the rim of the bowl I painted: Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. I think I’ll make another one only this one will say: No meat tastes as good as feeling good feels.

Wednesday – 20 Min. 1 mile on the elliptical

• Breakfast – An orange, whole grain toast and 1 cup of coffee.
• AM Snack – 1 hard boiled egg, 2 small pita pockets and guacamole/humus
• Lunch – Grits and cheese. (Oh come on, I was hungry and busy and tired and I opened the fridge and could hear them softly calling my name, "Sherry," they whispered, "Sherry, we're still in here."
• PM Snack – an apple and ¼ cup peanuts and almonds
• Dinner – Tofu, bean, cheese, sweet pepper and onion burrito. (And I only had one!)

Some Days are Hard

I dragged my butt out of bed this morning at 6 AM even though I really didn’t want to. Some days are like that. Most of the time it’s not that hard to get up and exercise, today was a huge effort just to get out there. But I did it! By the time I get dressed and get my shoes on it’s usually 6:10 which gives me 20 minutes to exercise before I have to be back in the house at 6:30. Sometimes when I feel like I did this morning I take an extra long time to get dressed and put on shoes and it’s 6:15 or 6:20 and it’s easy to say, “Oh that’s not enough time to exercise anyway,” and I blow it off. Not today! I pushed through that feeling and made myself get out there. I exercised for the full 20 minutes and made it a mile. May seem like a small thing, but I’m pretty proud of myself for it. I celebrated by enjoying the yummy grits my son-in-law made for breakfast. I love grits with cheese. Mmmmm Yum! They’re moving in to their new house soon. I’m really gonna miss those grits.

Tuesday – 20 Min. 1 mile on the elliptical

• Breakfast – Grits with cheese and a scrambled egg and 1 cup of coffee.
• AM Snack – 24 Sweet potato chips. (should’ve stopped at 12)
• Lunch – 1 hard boiled egg, 2 small pita pockets and guacamole/humus.
• PM Snack – a banana
• Dinner –A large loaded salad, small plate of spaghetti and a TJs sausage-less sausage.

Weighing In

Today is the big day! My first weigh in. Drum roll please…204.4. I lost 2.2 lbs. I lost weight. That’s good. It’s really hard to see the scale still hitting 200+ but I lost weight. If I keep this up I’ll be under 200 in 2 weeks.

Today was hard. Today was a grazing day. I don’t know why but I just felt like eating ALL day! Sometimes I actually felt hungry, other times I didn’t feel hungry at all I just felt like eating. I took Kerrie’s advice and drank lots of water; that helped some. The best thing was when I ate, I usually ate healthy stuff. Good thing I got a tree full of oranges in the back yard.

Like Scarlett always says: Tomorrow is another day. Another day to exercise. Another day to eat right. Another day to enjoy life. I LOST 2.2 POUNDS! YAY ME!!!

Monday – 20 Min. 1 mile on the elliptical

• Breakfast – banana and slice of whole grain toast and 1 cup of coffee.
• AM Snack – 2 oranges.
• Lunch – Vegan Pizza
• PM Snack – 12 Sweet potato chips and an apple
• Dinner – Grilled veggies over rice and beans and a salad.

Winning

Well it’s been a week. 7 days! I’ve exercised, I’ve drank enough water to drown a…well I don’t know what but something and I’ve been eating healthy. I’m weighing myself tomorrow to see how I’ve done weight wise, but I already know the first week has been successful. Between exercising every day and writing this every day, I am on my way to a new mind set and that’s the first step in a healthier lifestyle. I’m happier, I have more energy, my back still hurts but not near as much as it did and the pains in my legs are almost gone. Except the knee pain and even that is getting better.

Tracking weight loss is a good way to tell how you’re doing, but how do you track your outlook? That’s just something that you notice as you go along the way. If I could quantify my outlook and put it on a graph it would definitely be a line moving up. Weight down; outlook up. Yup, I’d say I’m winning.

Sunday – Grocery shopping and leg lifts as I go up and down in the process of making my granddaughter’s First Communion Dress

• Breakfast – orange, hard boiled egg and 1 cup of coffee.
• AM Snack – ½ cup nuts
• Dinner – Vegan Pizza. (had a late breakfast so no lunch)

Motivators

Kerrie is a really awesome motivator, but I gotta tell ya, she’s not my only one. I usually take a break from real exercise on the weekends. I figure running errands is enough running. Today I changed my mind, I ran twice as long as I usually do. And I have to admit, personal health is not the only reason I’m doing this. I think I’ve mentioned before I wrote a book, a contemporary young adult novel I call Luna Moon. A literary agent from a really great agency, Pippen Properties, is considering it now. I really hope she wants to take me on as a client, but just the fact that she is considering it has given me tremendous confidence that it will be published.

I have this vision of sitting at a table signing copies of Luna Moon for anxious teens and preteens. My friend’s 12 year old son read an early version, gave me some pointers, but said he liked it, but I’m sure most of the kids in that line will probably be girls. There’s this one, I picture her different every time, but her eyes are always the same. They’re hopeful and anxious and a little misty. I know I’ll know her by her eyes. I can see her stick her head out of the line once in a while to make sure I’m still there signing books and one time she catches me looking at her. She gives me a shy smile and ducks back in line. When it’s finally her turn, she’s hugging her well worn copy of Luna Moon to her chest. She hesitates for just a moment then thrusts the book toward me and says “I LOVE this book!” Her enthusiasm embarrasses her and brings tears to my eyes. I sign her book, but before she leaves I get up and go around the table to give her a hug, I make someone take a picture for both of us because she is the first person I don’t know who says that to me.

I’m exercising and eating right and trying to stay positive for Kerrie and for myself  and for my health. But I’m also doing it for her. I don’t know what her name is and I don’t know what she looks like, but I know she’s out there. The girls who will stand in line to get their copy of Luna Moon autographed don’t want to meet some fat old lady who can barely move. I can’t do anything about my age, but I can do something about my weight, my health and my ability to move more freely. So thanks Kerrie for being such a wonderful motivator and thanks too, to that girl. I can’t wait to meet you.

Saturday – 42 min. 2.1 miles on the elliptical (hey I couldn’t stop in the middle of Island Fever and Jimmy Buffett is also a pretty good motivator. Layers and layers of spices and flavors are making their way to my brain.)

Chasing Wyatt around at Girl Scout Thinking Day for 2 hours was a lot of exercise too.

• Breakfast – Bowl of oatmeal with dried apples and 1 cup of coffee.
• Lunch – Brown rice, black beans and sundried tomatoes.
• Dinner – 6” Subway Veggie sandwich on 9 grain honey and oat bread (or something like that) with avocados.

How Jimmy Buffett Fixed My Elliptical

I’ve done this before, the whole weight loss thing. About 10 years ago I noticed the pounds creeping on. We went into Sears for something. I don’t really remember what, but I was stopped dead in my tracks by this wonderful machine. I’m pretty sure a heavenly light was shinning on it and trumpets played softly, while angels sang when I turned the corner. We brought it home because I just knew it was the answer to all my prayers. A few years later I wrote this poem for a writing class. The teacher didn’t normally encourage rhyming poems, but I got an A on this. He said it was fun. Think I’ll keep it posted somewhere because once again, Reverend Jim is coming to my rescue.

How Jimmy Buffett Fixed My Elliptical

Forty pounds of excess weight,

no time to exercise.

This can’t go on, this has to stop,

it’s unhealthy and unwise.

A stroll through Sears, it caught my eye,

that magical machine.

I’ll take it home and work it off.

I know I can be lean.

I tried it out, right in the store

Its easy and its fun.

I love this thing; it’s really great.

I have to get me one!

I brought it home to my garage,

and used it the next morning.

Ten minutes in, I gasp for air,

this thing came without a warning.

I had a plan, I knew would work,

each day one minute more.

But not today, I just can’t.

My muscles are too sore.

A month went by and then was six.

What happened to my weight?

Instead of losing forty pounds,

I gained thirty eight.

This thing doesn’t work; I’m really mad.

I want my money back.

If I don’t lose almost 80 pounds,

I’ll have a heart attack.

A fellow Parrothead I know,

offered really great advise,

“The Jolly Mon can help” he said,

“and maybe a Cheeseburger in Paradise.”

Of Course! You’re right!

Jimmy Buffett and his guitar,

Delaney Talks to Statues,

And God Don’t Own a Car.

Now at 6:15 when that buzzer sounds,

I jump right out of bed.

Can’t wait to start my exercise.

Watch out, here comes a Parrothead!

I’m hot, I’m sweaty, I can’t go on,

I’m running out of will.

Wait, what song is next?

Can’t stop now, it’s Margaritaville!

Down fifty pounds, just thirty left,

I knew this was no whim.

It took your songs to make it work,

Thank you Reverend Jim.

Friday – 20 min. 1 mile elliptical

• Breakfast – 1 orange, a hard boiled egg and 1 cup of coffee. (Kerrie keeps telling my I should cut out the coffee because it’s bad for you, but I’ve heard a bunch of studies that say 1 cup is good for you. Any thoughts?)
• Lunch – Brown rice, black beans and sundried tomatoes & a banana.
• PM Snack – hand full of nuts.
• Dinner – cheese and spinach ravioli and a mixed green and veggie salad.

Clearing things up

Okay, just to clear things up. I know it's supposed to be except for me, I put accept for me on accident then thought about the play on words and decided to leave it that way. Accept for me; I'm accepting that I can't have chicken. Get it? Whatever...
Tonight I'm posting a really awesome poem!

Chicken: It’s What’s for Dinner (accept for me)

Tonight I face the most daunting challenge so far: Chicken for dinner. I promised Kerrie I’d go vegetarian for a month, but that doesn’t mean the rest of the family will. The nachos were a breeze, didn’t really miss them at all. My famous spaghetti and Italian sausages? A snap. Just substituted TJs sausage-less Italian sausages. They were actually pretty tasty. But tonight? Tonight I’m scared. As my, chicken’s-not-my-favorite-husband will attest to, I could eat chicken every night without a problem. There are so many ways to fix it too! I could eat a different kind of chicken every night for a month and not repeat the recipe…but I digress. This is supposed to help me, not make me want to go make a chicken salad for lunch. Tonight, while my family eats my favorite meal (truth be told, I’m making one of my less favorite chicken recipes) I will be eating Tofu! Trader Joe’s organically baked, savory flavored Tofu! I’m writing this post Thursday morning. I just put the chicken in the fridge to thaw. I won’t post this until tonight, after having passed the test. (Because I WILL pass it) But really? Tofu? Even my son the amazing Chef Jeff of Jeffry's Catering
can’t do with tofu what I can do with chicken. But a promise is a promise. Kerrie, if this doesn’t say “I love you” I don’t know what does.

Wow! I am very pleasantly surprised. That TJs really knows how to do tofu. I’ll admit it wasn’t as good as chicken but it was very tasty and the yummy grilled veggies added just the right amount of zing. Yeah…I can do this.

Thursday – 20 min. 1 mile elliptical

• Breakfast – 2 oranges, a hard boiled egg and 2 cups of coffee.
• Lunch – 3 small Pita breads with Humus/guacamole spread & a banana.
• PM Snack – an apple.
• Dinner – The afore mentioned Tofu, brown rice, grilled veggies and a salad.

Keeping it Positive

Things I’m looking forward to:

1. Waking up pain free.
2. Taking a brisk walk.
3. Having energy.
4. Shopping with Kerrie for my new wardrobe.
5. The book tour I’m taking with my husband when Luna Moon is published.

I have to keep these things in mind constantly. It’s important to stay positive and for me that’s a particularly difficult challenge. Left to my own devises I’m pretty much a positive thinking person. I get strength from the potential I see. I don’t just see the cup as ½ full, I tend to think of the cool refreshing taste of the water or the lovely flowers that water will sustain. I see the potential. Now my husband, he’s a different story. I wouldn’t say he’s a cup ½ empty sort of guy, he’s more like a “Water? Hey, where’s my juice? And did you use a clean cup, because that one looks a little dirty and by the way did you happen to make me a sandwich to go with that water?” kind of guy. Yes keeping it positive is defiantly a challenge for me. But I keep plodding away, trying to keep us both positive. Lucky for me, I have Kerrie. She’s a, “Oh my God, this is the best tasting water I’ve ever had in my whole life. Let’s go running now!!!” kind of person. She keeps me positive! When I can keep up with her…gotta go!

Wednesday – 20 min. 1 mile elliptical

• Breakfast – hard boiled egg, orange, cup of coffee.
• AM Snack – 1 banana and 1 cup of mixed nuts (I had to shell them though so ½ cup shelled)
• Brown rice with TJs Cajun style black beans & sundried tomatoes. And an apple.
• PM Snack – popcorn and a banana.
• Spinach & romaine salad with grape tomatoes, edamame & a hard boiled egg.

By the way I also always have a large glass of cool, refreshing water to go with all these meals and a few glasses in between as well.

Here's my before picture

Okay, so here I am. All dressed up for Easter, looking older than I should. I really don't like this picture but it works for the before pic.

When to Power Through?

Didn’t sleep much last night. My back was killing me. Thought I’d just do stretching exercises and stuff instead of the elliptical, but when I got up I felt ok and decided to give it a try. Wasn’t bad. I “ran” for about ½ a mile then started to get that twinge in my knee. I never know when to power through the pain and when to take it as a warning sign. I powered through. I “ran” (so what do you call it when you work out on an elliptical anyway?) for the rest of the mile in the 20 minutes I get in the morning. The knee hurts a little but it’s not bad.

So…how do you know when to power through and when to stop? My husband had a pain in his gut for over three years. Our idiot doctor told him he needed to exercise more. He walked, he did lawn maintenance, he helped our kids move, he even laid a concrete patio. The whole time, he was in pain. I never really knew how much. He saw idiot at least 4 or 5 times during those three years, he said to power through the pain. “You’ll be fine,” idiot kept telling him. Turns out he wasn’t fine. He went to a different doctor for something else and this doctor looks at him like he’s insane and said, “Well…you’ve got a pretty good hernia going there. Why didn’t you have that taken care of?” Long story short when he did have the surgery, it took twice as long as they said it would and the surgeon put a little notch on his belt for “worst hernia I’ve ever seen.” It took twice as long to recover than it should have. Sometimes powering through, is not the best thing to do. So when do you know?

BTW neither one of us go to idiot anymore.

Tues. 20 min. 1 mile on elliptical

• Breakfast – orange, Hard boiled egg and cup of coffee.
• AM Snack – 2 little pita pockets and humus/guacamole spread.
• Lunch – ½ cup organic brown rice mixed with ½ cup Cajun style black beans & ½ a banana.
• Dinner – Spaghetti with TJs sausage-less sausage. Glass of white wine.

Day One

I’m 55 years old, soon to be 56. I was born with a turned in knee. In high school a P.E. teacher publicly humiliated people who have turned in knees and gave us an “easy fix.” I did what she said until the day I was walking to school with my sister and my knee pretty much gave out. It got hot to the touch and putting any pressure on it at all sent spasms of excruciating pain through my leg. The pain stopped after about 15 minutes and I stopped doing what the teacher suggested but the damage was done. I’ve never had as intense an experience as the first one, but it still happens occasionally. I take care of babies that need and deserve to be held and cuddled and loved. I do that at the expense of my lower back, which is in pain most of the time. When I get out of bed in the morning my feet hurt so bad I hobble to the bathroom. I have a reoccurring pain that goes from my left shoulder up my neck and stops just behind my left ear. All that said, none of these experiences and pains define who I am. None of these things is the reason at 5’4” I weigh 206.7 pounds. TWO HUNDRED AND SIX POINT SEVEN POUNDS!!!

I love to laugh. I love to hear children laugh. I love to watch the sun come up in the morning. I love to watch it disappear in the evening. I am mesmerized by the full moon and am completely captivated by blue moons. I even wrote a book about a girl who was born on a blue moon. I love my family and I want to be the best me I can be for them. That means NO EXCUSES!  I have a completely amazing daughter (actually I have 3 amazing daughters, but one in particular is going to help me) who helps me, encourages me, and teaches me. Together we are going to get fit! She is a slave driving task master, but she loves me and even if I give up on myself she will never give up on me. So here I come world. I’m going to journal what I eat, how much I exercise and how much I weigh. If you want to watch my progress, come along. If you want to journey with me, I’d love the company. But I will do this. Thanks Kerrie, I love you.

Monday: 4-9-12 206.7 lbs. 20 minutes on the elliptical, I went 1 mile.

Breakfast - an orange off my tree and a cup of coffee

AM Snack - Some almonds and walnuts, I didn’t count them as I cracked them  open, I will from now on.

Lunch – Spinach and romaine salad with tomatoes and peppers and Newman’s Own Lite Balsamic vinaigrette dressing.

PM Snack – another orange

Dinner – 2 Trader Joe’s protein dogs wrapped in tortillas, spinach and romaine salad with carrots, tomatoes, peppers and edamame.